Seriously. They’re all quitting on me. I present for your perusal a shopping list of failed technology since I came to this island:

• Cell phone charger - Fortunately I solved this by getting a new phone.
• New phone - Power button got stuck after 1 day of use, making the phone shut off randomly.
• MOTU Ultralite - The interface that powers my entire performance? Yeah. Same story- shutting off randomly in the middle of a concert. Nothing like dead silence in the middle of a song with a packed dance floor.
• In-ear monitors - The wireless system that lets me hear myself when I sing? The $900 wireless system that keeps me from shouting my voice out? Yeah. Not working now.
• Earbuds - The $150 Shure earbuds I use for my monitors during performances? The right ear stopped working.
• Replacement earbuds - The $150 Shure earbuds I bought to replace them? The left ear stopped working a week after I bought them. And Sweetwater sent their replacement to my home in Boston. Thanks.
• The Myxcercycle - Somehow the controller unit shorted out, hopefully the new one will arrive today. In the mean time I’ve been pedaling a 55-pound bike with magnetic resistance on the front wheel.
• And now, MagSafe - The power brick for my MacBook came apart. I get to spend the next week borrowing power cables whenever possible and running off of battery a lot.
  Update: AppleCare is fooking amazing, btw. They’re overnighting me a new one for free. It’s an 18-month-old power brick and they’re just replacing it.

Someone please wake me when the rebellion is over. I just want my robots to behave again.