The thought occurred to me the other day that the iPad could be indispensable for home recording studios. Whenever a vocalist needs to record, they’re typically locked in a sound-proof vault while the engineer works the controls back where the computer desk is.

But what if I’m the only one in my studio?

Until now the only options have been hardware control surfaces like the $1,200 Mackie units that act like a full-featured mixer or boutique wireless units like the Frontier Designs Tranzport. The latter is really the only thing I could bring into a vocal booth with me. If you take a good look at the controls on this thing, you’ll notice a lot of it is hard-wired to buttons. If I wanted to create a few more vocal tracks or select takes while I’m tracking vocals, I’d have to keep leaving the booth. And this thing costs $200. If I want anything else, I’d have to run a cable all the way into the booth and I’d still be limited to the buttons and functions the manufacturer thought I’d want.

Now imagine I’m sealed into the mic bunker with an iPad and VNC. A device with no moving parts (read: vewy vewy quiet), a huge touch screen, and the ability to control absolutely every knob, slider, menu, and button that my recording software has to offer. If I’m recording vocals and suddenly realize that the tremolo on the guitar amp is making it difficult to stay on rhythm, I can shut it off without leaving the creative space. I can select the good takes to keep in my ears while I lay down harmony tracks. I can pull up lyrics or lead sheets as a PDF from my computer or on the iPad itself while I sing. Hell, if I’m feeling particularly masochistic, I could edit MIDI tracks by hand and tweak reverb settings from the comfort of my padded chamber.

When I’m performing my weekly UStream show, the iPad could let me control the chat room and broadcast console without taking CPU power away from my performance machine, the MacBook. But that’s another blog post, I’m sure.

Oh yeah, and it’s a frickin’ iPad too. When I’m out of the studio, I’ve still got games, books, music, movies, etc.

When I first saw the iPad’s launch, I was underwhelmed. Now, stacking it up next to current-model control surfaces, I can’t see myself buying anything else for in-booth control. I know this won’t make much of a difference to the general public, but for guys like me it opens up a world of possibilities. I need to save some money for two pieces of control gear: One bigass Mackie mixer for the desk, one iPad for everything else.

I am now the proud owner of a large dry-erase board. This is only worth blogging about because a giant blank canvas is a noteworthy thing in our age of little text fields and 140-character microblogging. The best and worst thing a creative person can stare at is a blank page- it represents either total freedom or an intimidating lack of substance.

It’s like looking down from the top of a ski slope. Either you see every twist and turn of the path you might take, or you see a big scary unbroken mountain staring back up at you. The difference, of course, is in the mind of the skier. In either case you’re certainly not going to want to walk down a narrow little path, structured by how someone else might have descended the mountain.

So much of how technology works is centered around the left-brained types. Outlining software, databases, calendars, and to-do lists force us to think in little lines of text. I would lay money down, however, that all of those innovations started life as an idea jotted onto a giant dry-erase board.

This is why we love the iPhone’s big touchscreen but still hate entering data with it. This is why we want Apple to release a tablet MacBook already. This is why, for all we do in front of little LCD monitors, our best steps forward start with a tube-dispensed liquid pigment (or, alternately, a stick of chalk).

If you haven’t invested in a full-size notebook or a dry-erase board large enough to use as a Pilates mat, it’s time for you to head to Staples and pick one up.

Photo by Jeff Kubina

Seriously. They’re all quitting on me. I present for your perusal a shopping list of failed technology since I came to this island:

• Cell phone charger – Fortunately I solved this by getting a new phone.
• New phone – Power button got stuck after 1 day of use, making the phone shut off randomly.
• MOTU Ultralite – The interface that powers my entire performance? Yeah. Same story- shutting off randomly in the middle of a concert. Nothing like dead silence in the middle of a song with a packed dance floor.
• In-ear monitors – The wireless system that lets me hear myself when I sing? The $900 wireless system that keeps me from shouting my voice out? Yeah. Not working now.
• Earbuds – The $150 Shure earbuds I use for my monitors during performances? The right ear stopped working.
• Replacement earbuds – The $150 Shure earbuds I bought to replace them? The left ear stopped working a week after I bought them. And Sweetwater sent their replacement to my home in Boston. Thanks.
• The Myxcercycle – Somehow the controller unit shorted out, hopefully the new one will arrive today. In the mean time I’ve been pedaling a 55-pound bike with magnetic resistance on the front wheel.
• And now, MagSafe – The power brick for my MacBook came apart. I get to spend the next week borrowing power cables whenever possible and running off of battery a lot.
  Update: AppleCare is fooking amazing, btw. They’re overnighting me a new one for free. It’s an 18-month-old power brick and they’re just replacing it.

Someone please wake me when the rebellion is over. I just want my robots to behave again.

There are days when the robots seem to gang up against me and try to make me crash. Since I’ve been prepping hardcore for my upcoming summer on Block Island, I’ve been tinkering with Apple’s MainStage software, and today it is kicking my ass. Seriously. It’s refusing to do my bidding, even though I’m running through basic concert setup with it.

I need to find a real, live, actual band one of these days, even if I have to abduct some aliens and give ‘em instruments to play.

If you could hear the hair-curling obscenities I’ve been hurling at my pile of technology, you probably wouldn’t be a fan anymore. This is why I don’t do the lifecasting thing!

Presented without comment (except for yours).

Edit: Okay, I lied, I’m commenting on the notion that “when people start moving to encryption… they know they’re engaging in illegal conduct.” Apparently you’ve never kept all your financial data on a laptop hard drive before. Maybe you should start suing Apple for including 128-bit system-level encryption on every single Mac. Those Cupertinian bastards are encouraging piracy, I say!

OK, I’m done.