Seriously. They’re all quitting on me. I present for your perusal a shopping list of failed technology since I came to this island:

• Cell phone charger – Fortunately I solved this by getting a new phone.
• New phone – Power button got stuck after 1 day of use, making the phone shut off randomly.
• MOTU Ultralite – The interface that powers my entire performance? Yeah. Same story- shutting off randomly in the middle of a concert. Nothing like dead silence in the middle of a song with a packed dance floor.
• In-ear monitors – The wireless system that lets me hear myself when I sing? The $900 wireless system that keeps me from shouting my voice out? Yeah. Not working now.
• Earbuds – The $150 Shure earbuds I use for my monitors during performances? The right ear stopped working.
• Replacement earbuds – The $150 Shure earbuds I bought to replace them? The left ear stopped working a week after I bought them. And Sweetwater sent their replacement to my home in Boston. Thanks.
• The Myxcercycle – Somehow the controller unit shorted out, hopefully the new one will arrive today. In the mean time I’ve been pedaling a 55-pound bike with magnetic resistance on the front wheel.
• And now, MagSafe – The power brick for my MacBook came apart. I get to spend the next week borrowing power cables whenever possible and running off of battery a lot.
  Update: AppleCare is fooking amazing, btw. They’re overnighting me a new one for free. It’s an 18-month-old power brick and they’re just replacing it.

Someone please wake me when the rebellion is over. I just want my robots to behave again.

There are days when the robots seem to gang up against me and try to make me crash. Since I’ve been prepping hardcore for my upcoming summer on Block Island, I’ve been tinkering with Apple’s MainStage software, and today it is kicking my ass. Seriously. It’s refusing to do my bidding, even though I’m running through basic concert setup with it.

I need to find a real, live, actual band one of these days, even if I have to abduct some aliens and give ‘em instruments to play.

If you could hear the hair-curling obscenities I’ve been hurling at my pile of technology, you probably wouldn’t be a fan anymore. This is why I don’t do the lifecasting thing!

[tags]Matthew Ebel, piano rock, robots, technology, lifecasting, obscenity[/tags]

Presented without comment (except for yours).

Edit: Okay, I lied, I’m commenting on the notion that “when people start moving to encryption… they know they’re engaging in illegal conduct.” Apparently you’ve never kept all your financial data on a laptop hard drive before. Maybe you should start suing Apple for including 128-bit system-level encryption on every single Mac. Those Cupertinian bastards are encouraging piracy, I say!

OK, I’m done.
[tags]Matthew Ebel, piano rock, RIAA, technology, piracy, assholes[/tags]

I know that right now the über-cool thing to do is play a concert in [tag]Second Life[/tag]. The problem with a show in SL is that you can have, at most, about 50 fans attending. Not to mention that one could very easily put on a “concert” that’s nothing more than a pre-recorded “live-esque” soundtrack, ensuring that you never miss a note and never drop a rhythm.

If it’s possible to be less legit than [tag]Milli Vanilli[/tag], SL makes it happen.

Now this isn’t to say I’ll never play a show in SL. I do think the developing technology is quite cool. However, all the hype and attention it’s getting just doesn’t equate to how cool a real [tag]First Life[/tag] concert tour can be.

So please… do yourself and the music a favor, and step away from the computer. Go downtown. Watch a real musician perform onstage. Your social life will thank you.

[tags]getafirstlife.com[/tags]

To quote [tag]Bill in Portland, Maine[/tag]:

CHEERS to the [tag]iPHONE[/tag]!!!! It slices! It dices! It makes julian fries at the touch of a button! Turn it upside down and it becomes an all-in-one tire inflator and grout remover! Place a pork roast in the chamber and then…”set it and forget it!!” But wait, there’s more! Make deposits and withdrawals with the handy ATM feature! Twist on the rotor attachment and to turn it into your own personal CommuterCopter™! Or add the exclusive Nipple 3.0 and feed your infant 100% pure breastmilk for up to 10 minutes while playing the latest single from Beyonce! And somewhere on it I think there’s a phone. How quaint.

iWant one. Just have to wait until summer to get it.

So everyone’s talking about the hypothetical [tag]iPhone[/tag]™ soon to be announced by [tag]Apple Computer[/tag]. Much has been made of the fact that the trademarks and patents are already filed, not something [tag]Apple[/tag] does just for fun. Yet nobody can figure out just what’s supposed to be so groundbreaking.

A phone? That plays music? *YAWN*

I think I’ve figured it out, though, and I owe this revelation to the [tag]SciFi Network[/tag].
Read More…

I’ll make this one brief: [tag]Scientists[/tag] announced Monday that they have developed a high-tech [tag]T-shirt[/tag] that turns the strumming of an [tag]air guitar[/tag] into music.

God help us all.

[tags]the seventh seal[/tags]

If you’re reading this, chances are good that you’ve become a fan of mine through [tag]podcasting[/tag] or some other [tag]internet[/tag] venue. So it shouldn’t surprise you that I’m following this little debate closely.

In case you weren’t aware, there’s a battle raging quietly about [tag]internet regulation[/tag] that will eventually determine whether or not tiny businesses like podcasters and [tag]indie artists[/tag] can even afford to use the internet to promote and expand.
Read More…

So now [tag]Microsoft[/tag] is going to pay [tag]Universal Music[/tag] a fee for every single [tag]Zune[/tag] player they sell? How exactly does this benefit the consumer?

From what I’ve read, it doesn’t sound like some court settlement, Microsoft actually went along with this idea. I suppose if the Zune came pre-installed with a bunch of Universal music… or maybe if you get a discount on Universal albums/tracks for buying the Zune… Hmm, there doesn’t seem to be any mention of a deal like that anywhere.

In fact, Microsoft still projects the Zune price at $250 and [tag]Zune Marketplace[/tag] song prices at 99¢ per track.

And the Zune doesn’t support podcasts.

So, effectively, Microsoft is just paying a tribute to a major record label for no reason. How exactly is this better than an [tag]iPod[/tag]? And, for that matter, how exactly does this benefit artists, fans, or the music itself?

[tags]Yahoo! News[/tags]

A little gem of an article from The [tag]Macalope[/tag] makes me glad I do all this- music, podcasting, web design -on a Mac. Those of you still stuck using (rather, being used by) Windows have this to look forward to:

Which Vista Is the Right Vista?

Is it Vista Starter, which can only access 256 MB of RAM and run a maximum of three applications at a time…?

…Maybe it’s Vista Home Basic which isn’t crippled (other than it just being Windows – zing!). Oh, but it doesn’t include the [tag]Aero Glass[/tag] interface either. And it doesn’t work well in domain or Active Directory [tag]networks[/tag].

…Wait, wait, wait. Forget that. You know what should do? Instead of trying to figure this out, you should just buy Vista Ultimate. Have you got $400? And another $1,500? Because you’re going to need a new machine.

All in all, there’s six versions of suckage on the way from Microsoft. Six! I can’t imagine how this could be good for compatibility with audio hardware and software. Or, frankly, any hardware or software.

[tags]Windows Vista, Apple, Macintosh, OSX[/tags]